It's been over a little more than a month since I had last worked out at the gym. I have been occasionally gone on my walks and have found myself being in a bit of a rut right now. Why? I dunno, chemical imbalances in my body and mind? Am I being lazy? Depression kicking in? To be truthfully honest I have no idea, I tend to blame it on being depressed, though I would probably guess it's a mild depression that has popped it's ugly little head time and time again. I pull myself out and get dragged back down again.
I don't want to be a hermit or not see my friends and family. But sometimes I feel it should be the thing to do for a while so I can focus and stay on target. I have been keeping my portions under control and haven't gone all out crazy eating "Mountains of Food". I've managed to still loose weight by watching how much I eat and taking on consideration on what I am eating. I haven't been eating a lot of red meat like I use to, it's been more of chicken turkey and salads at work (sometimes) but it helps. I have my inspiration wall and I look myself in the mirror for words of empowerment... sometimes the words help lol....
I guess, well I know I need to be more proactive again and get my arse back into the gym and back on my walks. Where I am mentally could be better and physically it is getting better, slowly but getting better. The should of, would of, could of's are slowly disappearing in my mind and away from my vocabulary... I guess it is time to gear and load up my baggage and toss it. I have 2 months and 13 days to shape up!!!
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