It's Saturday, 12:37am, February the 14th 2009. I can't sleep. Eyes wide open. The TV is off and everyone is asleep. I can hear the wind blowing outside from the cracks of the window. It's freezing, I'm alone. I'm thinking of the past, I talked to him today. I miss him a lot.
I miss us. How we were inseparable from each other. I missed his smiles. His gentle touch. I miss the warmth of his body. The touch of his soft skin. His soft feathery hair. I miss dreaming with him, planning our future and where we would live. How many dogs we would have and how many children we would adopt. I miss thinking on how much I would be the perfect "Housewife".
He was my little man, my darling, my reason for waking in the morning. My being. I wish I could hold your hand again. I wish I could kiss you again. Will you ever find it your heart to offer me a second chance? Will you ever let me call you my own? To hold you and to kiss you. To pick you up when you are down. To dust you off when you have fallen from so high. To be your Lion and to be your lamb.
It's been years, we talked, and you said no. But yesterday when we spoke. I was on Cloud Nine. I was happy, I was smiling, no one seemed to matter to me but you. The feelings gone, the feelings lost. We are now just friends. Friends..... Oh Brian, how I miss you so.
Forever yours,
Me
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