As I have been working tons, going out when I can, and just being alone when I can, I notice that I hate it all. In a sense. I hate the fact that I have no one to call my own. Today I was reminded that I'm one of those guys who is called upon because "WE" are fun, "WE" are big and it makes you feel safe. Fucking A! I hate it.... I want a Boy, a Man, a Twink, Otter, Bear, Something to call my own! I'm sick of this alone shit. yes I'm rambling, but if you have ever been single for a substantial amount of time then you would know what I am talking about.
It boggles the mind how I can have all these "Hot Ass" friends but yet none of them find me attractive. It's really frustrating and depressing and that has been my issue lately. I'm sorry if I ever snapped or snipped at you, but FUCK really? I need a break, I need a honest man that's not in his fucking 50's telling how "hot" I am. I know they're desperate but I'm not. I'm working on changing my appearance to seem more appealing but honestly it's not to find a man but to satisfy myself.
I'm just so depressed and alone it's starting to get to me again.... I'm tearing up again and I think I may cry myself to sleep tonight.... If you care thanks. If not, then have a great night n life.
Cheers,
Mikey
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